I am not being taken seriously at work, for some reason I am lowering myself to others at work when I know I shouldn’t. for some reason I am acting shy, child looking, and I know that I am doing it only after the event.
it seems I have no control as to why I am doing this.
it seems that I am seeking attention and validation from others.
I don’t know why I am doing this… is this because I am not confident in undertaking the task or I don’t know anything.
Should I just keep quiet and do my work? maybe so, I think that should be my strategy going forward before i damage my rep.
I feel that I am weaker in front of the others QS and stronger mentally against the other people.
I keep seeking attention for every little thing.
I need to stop this.
I need to be consciously aware of that and stop myself from commenting and adding my opinion. maybe it’s that I don’t have anyone around me to talk to that I am being led that way.
I want to change I want to be better. I want to be perceived as a person with control, I don’t feel like I’ve been given the chance to get into that place.
tomorrow I am going to crack on with my work, hard and concentrated.
I’ll list out the prioritise and the sequence at which I need to work to. I will be calm and take time to respond to others.
I know I am good at this and charismatic.
I need to be the best because I am the best.
I want to slow everything down, my thoughts, etc.…
I am in control and I don’t need to seek their help.
I don’t need them, I can work it out myself and do it slowly and up to the quality. I don’t need to seek their approval.
this feeling I would call it shaky, it is when I am not in full control and I am seeping out confidently against others.
this lack of concentration isn’t helping at all.
tomorrow when I wake up I need to give myself some time to relax and meditated. I need to concentrate at the task at hand and be fully conscious of my surrounding.
I need to be my best self.
I am the best.
in regards to writing content, I did a little bit of it for my dad’s website, but the problem is that I don’t know anything about the subject that would be valuable. I am learning while I am writing. Which is a pain…..
However, I am planning on writing an article on payment terms and the housing grant this week. I will use this for my RICS as well as my business blog.
I think I will enjoy this. I am aiming at producing a mind map by the end of tomorrow.
and on the back burner I am thinking of breaking down the studies of the RICS APC. I will use the study guidelines and work my way out of it. I will work on this on the weekend and write shit loads.
I’ll probably end up at a Starbucks in central London and kick back with my laptop and write away. at the end of the day, my new-found philosophy is to write my way to success by developing detail information about the industry through writing.
All it takes is a few 1000s word and you’re knowledged enough about a certain topic. I think in addition to writing it is the constant repetition of that subject that makes you a great person in that field.
I was also thinking about a niche within the market that has some demand of some sort, the NEC and BIM ideally. The NEC contract is growing its market share every day, and BIM is a new government initiative that most construction will need to adhere too. I think we should take a look at the implementation in HK on how they deal with the Building information modelling there and what they include here. Learn from them and add on?
well anyway I’m knackered, I’ll crack onto this tomorrow and get the most of tomorrow. Be on top of things.