Dancing Monkey

I think i have dancing monkey syndrome, i am not progressing my game at all. …




however I saw a post from an instructor and it seems to be a good fix for this.


Aims to fix this issue:

I need to fix Attraction; Attraction is to demonstrate that you want her but you don’t need her. Being needy is not good. That’s why the attraction material works to demonstrate that mindset.

If you’re comfortable towards her that means you’re confident around her which is sub-communicate you’re already around hot women and know how to deal with them. Pre-selection.

Showing that you’re comfortable around her (if she is hot), will sub-communicate confidence which will demonstrate pre-selection. Pre-selection because she will put you in the same category as guys who can deal with girls of her standard as you’re not phase by her.

the inner game here is not to be affected by others and your thoughts are strong and not weak. Your thoughts should be she’d want to fuck you.


A few points to remember about Attraction material:

  • Attraction material is the pepper and not the steak
  • Don’t make teasing the main point of interaction and pushing and pushing pushing.
  • Attraction should be fun, fun, normal, fun, sexual, fun, normal, normal, fun, sexual, fun, normal, normal, sexual, fun, normal and so on.
  • Be Sexual
  • Convey strong masculinity and ownership of your sexuality.
  • Proximity and body language
  • You don’t know her yet
  • you’re not that interested in her.
  • Her looks just got her foot in the door


Application of being social

Go out tonight and feel that you own the venue and act that you do. You’ll give that vibe of confidence, you have to fake it until you make it. Basically this ties up to my theory of warming up the venue by being social. this gives your brain to opportunity to warmup the social nodes to allow you to talk.

Technical aspects


Find a few key transitions that you can use. What are transitions?

basically starting new threads the following ways are to transition:

– Cold Read

He: you look very tall, how do you feel to be the king of the midgets? *while pointing to the other shorter people*

Also a good way to go about it is  @OMG, x…..@


Just keep doing trigger words

Cold reading

Best exercise here is to take every question and reframing it to statements? basically do you remember the things you want to get to know from the girl? well try to rephrase them to statements:

Turn your questions into statements

What do you do for a living?

you look like a stripper or an accountant, i can’t tell which one.

you look like a gangsta or lawyer, i can’t tell which one

you look like you sell drugs or lawyer, i can’t tell which?

you look like you are either stay at home mum or fashion designer, i can’t tell which one.

Where are you from?

you’ve got an accent, where is that from?

You’ve got a distinct style you are not from London are you?

You look very polite you must be African?

You seem very polite you must be African?

You’ve got this aura are you an america hippie?

OmG, its so great that i’ve found someone from Nigeria

After handshake wow crazy handshake, where did you learn that from?

what is your passion and dream?

hey you look like you don’t belong here, you seem elsewhere

you’re probably a teacher you’ve got the “save the world  vibe about you”

You seem like you’re on a mission of some sort, you’re letting of this vibe of i need to be successful

I can tell that you’re a very passionate person on the way you set yourself to others, your style and stance. You must be very passionate or creative when you do something. I bet you’re working on something at the moment.


Are you adventurous?

Hey I couldn’t stop noticing you’ve got a good stance, shows you’ve got confidence, are the type of girl who’s outgoing?

You look bored, I bet you’re as fucking crazy and hyperactive as I am! It must itch you to sit still?

I bet you’re itching to do something crazy and adventurous

Are you healthy?

Hi my name is kaps handshake…wow! You’ve got strong handshake for a girl do you do judo or any sports?

Omg check those guns are you a marathon runner or judo warrior?

Check those arms, are you into the military or a boxer!

Are you getting hyper again.??….because you’re really cute when you’re hyper

Are you studying?

Hey you look like some serious bookworm, how many books can you eat in a week? I mean read!!!

Wow you’ve got dead serious strong eye contact I bet you watch a lot of video games or TV.

Do you travel?

You’ve got this vibe about you, you seem you have travelled a lot of places or know a lot of people, I just cant tell.

Hey you’ve got this accent, I really love people who love to travel it shows that they have a  lot of cultural knowledge, have you travelled much?


Wow it looks like you’ve got a tan, have you been anywhere recently?





Here a disqualifier is a good technique to demonstrate that you’re not hitting on her and you chose not to be interested in her, it should be positive and that you’re not disqualifying her because of anything bad about her, that qualification in its sense if you IOD on something you don’t like, demonstrates boundaries.


It shows :

  1. you’re not easy
  2. shows your not hitting on her
  3. demonstrates value sub-consciously



You and I are not going to get along.


Actionable disqualifiers:

Not buying her drinks and not giving in to her tests and the such when she asks early on in the conversation.


DHV types

  1. 1.    she observes it
  2. 2.    she learns of it from a trusted personal source, like a friend
    1. a.    she sees a picture of me with the owner of restaurant
    2. 3.    She learns of it from a neutral source
      1. a.    She sees a picture of me with the owner of the restaurant
      2. 4.    She learns of it from a source that is biaised to me, like my friend.
        1. a.    My friends tells her that I am friends with the owner of the restaurant
        2. 5.    I tell her
          1. a.    I tell her that I am friends with the owner of the restaurant


Oh shit moments

Some statements that you can use when you can’t think of anything:

  1. Why do you hate jesus?
  2. Are you racist
  3. Is that a threat?
  4. Give me your purse!…yes that’s right, that’s what we do, I steal money off small girls
  5. So basically you’re trying to ruin my life (marriage/divorce role-play)




Body Language:

  1. straight
  2. shoulders back
  3. chin up
  4. smile on your face (shit eating grin as though you know something they don’t)
  5. don’t ever face the girl until she faces you
  6. include takeaway


Last night post two

Last night I met up with Richard, I would consider him a natural, we had good time but sore throat was playing up and it started to ache!


Anyway the first two sets I opened went shit because I was not in the mood and she was not as hot as I wanted and I would consider it a warmup.

Opened with a situational opener, maybe my facial expression was too much, i guess so as my energy was wayy to high and i got a yellow light from both interaction. There was no such intent.


Then the first set hooked because she was actually a normal chick out of the fashion fuckers.

Anyway interaction went well and got my target hooked, however i bantered too much instead of getting to know here and build some rapport. It went shit and shit.

we reopened them at  the bar and what i like is Richard ploughed throughout to get the girl and I bailed. I think i needed to see that to push myself in set and not give a shit about my wing. Really if I’m out gaming like i use to and bailing out then fuck it.

plus i would say i didn’t bother wanting to talk because my throat was killing me.


at least i tried to ask question which then backfired as there was no intent, and i didn’t ask the right question.


taking from the mistakes i’ve made I will read up on that book conversation lubricant and do some more he/she exercise where I get to know her instead of running lines as at the moment i’m using my stock stuff. So I’ve got to interact and observe interaction.




went out with richard tonight, opened a few sets, some went poop. Then hooked a good set but mostly with the help of my mate richard.


Set went well, but was teasing too much! need to stop teasing too much, focus on other attraction factors, take a look at other organic conversation techniques, rapport building and questions. look at Lovesystems humour seminar notes!



Hate being sick

yesterday I was not feeling too great however, I was sill awake all day doing all my work from home …. meh… still feel a bit eeeuggh.

Anyway this week I need to get back on track on my studies, I guess I’ve not done much at all regarding reading and making notes. Best thing to do for me now is to work on getting my laptop running at work so that I can download some books from the online archive and do some reading.

For today I’ll try go through the notes and do the stuff from the Bozun book. I still think that book is epic!

then i’ll do some he/she exercise for a bit then head to sleep early.

Maybe tomorrow I would go to the gym in the morning if i’m feeling any better, its been so disorganised going out last few nights last week.


This week’s focus is getting back onto undertaking my habits, tonight I’m going to focus on reading one of the modules, do one he/she exercise then go sleep while going through the bosun book.


qualification again!

5 Qualities I am looking in a woman.


  • Smart
  • Healthy
  • Crazy
  • Passionate
  • Continuously striving to achieve more

Structure for soft qualification

1. State a preference

2. explain why

3. Invite her


I really like people who travel, there is something passionate about people who do that, do you travel?


Medium Qualifiers

Open ended questions

So tell me about yourself?

if you could do anything in the world without fear or failure what would you do?

Question games

what is the craziest place you’ve had sex?

when i first met i thought you were going to be X but now that I’ve got to know you you’re Y

thats’ great! too bad you’re x


new funny shit

structure for  deaf joke

i hate the underground sometimes you get all sorts of people. short fat and all sorts.

now your in the tube you’re like waiting sitting down looking around just waiting for that fucker to blow up in the carriage you know. like fuck me.

one thing i hate is this don’t you hate it when everyone rushes out the train and we get to the barriers right and theres always that one fucker, that one fucker who gets to the gate and then looks for his ticket. fucking idiot we’ve been at this for years and years but some people just don’t get it. I’m a smart fucker i get my ticket out when i leave the carriage.

now i’m at the barrier right and I tell him oi what the fuck. he doesn’t reply he keeps looking for his ticket. I was like fuck off man. he still doesn’t move. I was just about to take a step in and touch his shoulder to wake him up and walked on his dog. he had like a green jacket on there. You know them dogs for the blinds right? well on that jacket it was dog for the deaf, so i leaned down and told the dog “get the fuck out of the way”.


field report 9/2/13

The aim of this night was to elongate the conversation again and to introduce some qualification instead of doing high energy attraction without getting to know the girls.


We went to foundation in covent garden because my mate doesn’t like dumb chicks. Anyway we went there and we went to the bar cracked jokes and he kinda like the atmosphere. We then saw a hottie (i thought was quite mystique, and from essex, so it would be a good warmup) anyway I approached with the intent of knowing where tiger tiger is and if its better than this place because we want to have a good night out. the girl hooked and I was quite amazed that she didn’t sound like from essex and we cracked a few jokes on why we were out and at that point her mate came and we cracked jokes with her. Told her I was out to find a wife who has to be rich and is black. (maybe next time i could qualify straight away and say, too bad you’re black (when she isn’t) I’ve been out tonight to look for a good looking white chick. maybe we could observe the reaction at that point).

anyway we bantered and we qualified if she could cook and if she was smart. they were both smart and we were in the win. My girl I was talking to gave me a lot of shit test like don’t touch me, and I replied

‘haahaha you know what I love that, i love that you’re very defensive, you could be the perfect girlfriend who i could let her go out on her own in a club and never worry that she’ll get hit on. “

she: ‘wait am i that defensive?’ 

he: ‘well yes, You know like the black woman in line at the supermarket yeah? well you have that defence mechanism that if someone cuts through the line at the till you’ll actually say OIII BOMBA CLOT GET DAA FUCK OUT THE LINE, THERE IS NO CUTTING *in Nigerian/africa accent*’

at that point she cracked up soo much and she said I’m not black. I told her its ok I’ve got a box of shoe shine we can work something out.  after that she let out that she has a boyfriend and I said some shit and bantered some more and asked her what she did. she was a manager at some store in london.

anyway conversation went on and on with more banter then we went back to the question if tiger tiger was good. at that point my mate and I had our own conversation where the girls were just dropping in. we each faced each other. anyway we said we’ll see them in a bit then set off to toilets and then opened another set.

that set lasted another 10-20 min, i had a lot resistance from them as they were eastern european. I told the girl she was gorgeous and she was a yellow light. she said thank you, i ploughed some more and I said that I love that she’s hard to get and thats a quality I’m looking for in a girl, I think before that she said she had a BF already, then i used that to bump off to the second hottest chick in set and talked to her and bantered and ask if she could be my sugar mama and get me shit.

That was a tough crowd and I cracked a lot of racist jokes but not a lot of hooking because they were white and I was treading on very thin line HAHAHAAa.. anyway i fucked off after a bit she was not interesting.


we then opened a few set for jokes to get a high and left to tiger then my mate energy started to go down and we didn’t do much in tiger but have a bit of fun and left at 11pm then headed down soho and I was still having fun just taking the piss out of people for my own fun because i know we’re not going to do anything tonight. 

i was out just telling all the chinese people happy new year. my friend was like dude they’ll think you’re racist. told him its cool don’t worry.


we talked in cafe nero with some more bullshit and then went home.



aim for next weekend is to rework on qualification and relate game. I need to focus on following through questions: 

i’ve noticed the following fix in the conversation:


what happened

he: what do you do?

she: i work as a manager in x

he: oh great you’re rich! we can get married! 

she: haha,

<more banter>

what i could do to improve is this:

he: what do you do?

she: i work as a manager in x

he: oh great you’re rich! we can get married! 

she: haha

he: oh great tell me more about it! you must love your job?

<here i’m asking her to elaborate and invest more>

so recap:

focus on :

  • qualification more on relating questions
  • dial down on conversation and keep observing
  • ask for numbers


p.s. to self new funny joke to include

NSPCC and pedofile “excuse me sir do you like child

joke comes from this:

i was walking down oxford street today and you know them nspcc green people working for charity well they stopped me and said ‘excuse me sir do you love kids’ I was like fuck me there surely must be other ways to catch pedofiles.