Aims, Needs, Want, Plan…focusing it

Continuing from a post I did yesterday about where I want to be and focusing my objective on my relationship and social life. While browing my RSS feeds I found this interesting article on self-development & goals. It is a 5 part entry and since writing this entry there have been only 3 of 5 entries available to the public. Combining that article and a few previous readings I’ve done I will go through some steps to achieve my goal and see results.

What I will try to cover for the next few blogs is:

  1. Where I want to be/What I want
  2. Where I am at the moment.
  3. What problems I am facing.
  4. How I am going to get there (step by step)
  5. The final plan of my action
  6. Measuring my progress
  7. Taking feedback

Where I want to be/What I want

What I need to find out is where I want to be. Like I’ve said in my previous post I want to be in a position where I am in a relationship with someone whom would like to talk to me nearly everyday and do things together.  I’d want to share experience together. With the occasional sex and all. I want to be able to be confident and myself and not too crazy as I was before in my relationship. I also in the process would like to be able to be someone who can walk up to anyone on the street and chat them up and possibly date. I want to be able to see a person, strike a conversation, get there number and then see where it goes from there.

Where I am at the moment

How am I going to get there? Well I’ll have to first analyse where I am with relationship and social status. ATM I am a student, it is fairly easy for me to meet people at uni, especially in the library or the bar as we all have a common ground, we go university. So the first thing that I ask is, ‘what do you study?’ right after I say “hi”. What the problem is that most of the girls that I have met are already in a relationship or just not interested in me as I was perceived differently, which I believe I am handling quite well since December last year as I have changed my perception to others by revealing less of certain things and revealing more. But any-who… the current things I have at the moment is 3-5 good friends who are girls at university, most of them know of my issues. I probably know around another 6-8 more who I just say “hi” to. But the ones who don’t, like me (a lot), I am not interested in them. It’s just that I can’t really perceive myself with them at all. They are ok, looking but I really don’t want to be with people who just cuts it in looks. I know this may sound arrogant or like an arsehole, but come on… if I’ve changed from a fat bastard to what I am today and then I should earn the respect of a descent looking girl.

What are the problems I am facing

What the problem is at the moment is that I can only talk to people easily at university and not in the ‘wild’, which I really want to do. What I fear is that people I walk by around me that I want to talk to do not have a common ground with me. Which sort of scares me in the approach at times. If I am in a queue for something, I would find it easy to strike a convo there, but not out of random while walking. Which is part of my ultimate goal too, being able to approach people out of random. While just talking about it, it feels like there is nothing to fear when talking to random people on the street. 1. you don’t know them, 2nd there is a very small chance of seeing them again, 3rd people are kind and not nasty so they will be kind to you if you talk to them, as long as you don’t approach them too creepily.

I think I covered enough for today, tomorrow I’ll cover some more and maybe update some of the areas I’ve already covered. 

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